The Secret to Finding Yourself

Trying to find yourself has gotten a mixed reputation. It can be a convenient excuse when you want to break up with someone without mentioning the real reasons.

It can also be a diversion from accepting responsibilities, like doing your share of household chores or getting a job.

On the other hand, figuring out who you are and what you need to do in order to have a fulfilling life could be the most important and satisfying questions you’ll ever answer.

If you’re sincere about self-discovery, try these suggestions to guide you in your search.

What to Look For:

1. Clarify your values.

Knowing your values helps you to make sound decisions and prioritize your activities.

Consider how your values relate to your daily life. Look for opportunities to live in agreement with them.

Summarize your philosophy into a personal values statement you can refer to when needed.

2. Understand your strengths.

Do you know where your talents lie and what you feel passionate about?

You’ll accomplish greater things with less stress when you choose a path that lets you leverage your main assets.

3. Build support.

Finding yourself is tough work. You’ll need a sturdy network of family, friends, and colleagues you can rely on for advice and support.

Being generous about sharing your resources with others increases the likelihood that they’ll want to do the same for you.

4. Create flow states.

What activities boost your energy levels and make you lose track of time?

Whether you love playing the piano or solving physics equations, chances are these flow states will suggest the fields in which you can excel.

5. Set goals.

Having a destination in mind guides your steps and keeps you on track. Where do you want to be in 5 or 10 years?

Learn more here in my free online guide for how to set goals

Where to Look:

1. Listen to yourself.

Finding yourself is about living authentically. Pay attention to what your mind and body are telling you.

Notice when you feel engaged and when you feel lost. Is there a pattern behind these situations?

2. Accept your feelings.

Acknowledge your emotions, even when they cause you discomfort. Trying to suppress the truth will backfire and produce more stress.

When you accept your anger or sorrow, you can start thinking about positive options for dealing with it.

3. Ask your friends.

While you’re cultivating self-knowledge, you may benefit from listening to how others view you.

Their feedback may point out qualities and habits that you overlook.

4. Keep a journal.

Writing about your journey encourages you to learn and grow.

Recording your activities and insights regularly in a journal can help you to find solutions to personal challenges and build your self-esteem.

5. Read literature.

Observing how characters in movies and novels behave may teach you how to handle similar events in your own life.

You may find yourself viewing a long-standing conflict in a new light or experimenting with a different way of responding.

6. Welcome new experiences.

Breaking out of your comfort zone is bound to reveal surprising facets of your personality.

Taking an exotic vacation or leading a pilot project at work may inspire you to plan a bigger transformation.

7. Practice your faith.

For many adults, spiritual beliefs play an essential role in defining themselves and their goals.

If your faith is central to your life, study the scriptures in your tradition, talk with other members of your community, and put your beliefs into action.

Finding yourself is an ongoing process that lasts a lifetime. Being willing to discover the truth about yourself.

Aligning your activities with your values and goals will help you to lead a more rewarding and successful life.

There are many new Journals and planners being released, I hope you get to check some of them out.

9 Signs That Your Life is on Track

How can you know if you’re doing well? It’s not fair to yourself to compare your situation to that of your friends, family, or peers. There’s no set path for life, but there are clues that can let you know if you’re doing well.

It’s worth the time to assess your life once a year to ensure that things are moving forward. If they’re not, you’ll know that some changes are in order.

Look for these signs to ensure that you’re making progress with your life:

1. You have a clear vision for your life that appeals to you.

If you’re over 18 and you haven’t decided on a direction for your life, you’re not on track.

If you’re not working toward something, you’re slowly moving toward chaos. Choose something. You can always change your mind later.

○ Consider the type of life you want to live. How do you want to live each day? Start making that happen.

○ Have goals that you’re consistently making progress toward.

2. You are learning what you need to learn.

What do you need to learn to live the life you want?

○ For example, if you want to be a lawyer, you need to go to college and then attend law school. If you’re not in school and are working at The Burger Shack, your life isn’t on track.

○ Many goals require special knowledge. You might need to learn to speak Russian or how to play the piano.

There’s so much you can learn on your own these days that there’s no reason not to be educating yourself as much as possible.

3. Your credit score is strong.

If your credit score stinks, you’re not doing as well as you could be. You don’t need to be wealthy to have a good credit score.

You primarily need to pay your bills on time and avoid using too much of your available credit.

4. You have a social life.

No one is better off being alone 100% of the time. You need to interact with others.

You may need a big social circle or a small one, but you need people in your life.

5. You have a place to sleep and food to eat.

Keep in mind that much of the world’s population is without a bed, food, or water.

If you have these things, you’re doing better than most.

6. You are able to take care of your health issues.

Is your weight under control? Do you have access to the medical care that you require? Do you have the financial resources to pay for those services?

7. You have a sufficient income to pay for the necessities.

Basically, can you pay your bills each month? Do you have food and clothes? Can you pay your heating bill?

If you’re struggling to pay your bills each month, your life isn’t on track.

8. You’re doing better than you were last year.

You might be struggling mightily, but if your life is improving, it’s a good sign that your life is on track.

9. You have the freedom to be yourself.

If you feel compelled to be someone you’re not, you’re not on track.

You might dream of riding a motorcycle across North America with a full sleeve of tattoos, but if you’re stuck in an office pretending you enjoy filing tax returns, you’re off track with your life.

Everyone’s life veers off the chosen path now and then. What’s important is to recognize it and take the appropriate steps to get things back on course.

If you have goals, you’re making progress with those goals, you can pay your bills, and you’re happy and healthy, you’re doing great!

Otherwise, get busy making a few changes to move toward a life that fulfills you.

Did you find this post fun, informative and useful? If so, please share it with others!

If you have a comment, question or suggestion, please leave a comment below!

Cheers, Helene Malmsio

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